AANB: dedicated to answering questions about nonbinary or genderqueer identities.

Anonymous asked:
Hey so the original valuegirlhood deleted their blog. The person who now runs it is attempting to make it into a safe space for trans women. Just thought you should know!

I don’t have the spoons to verify this

Use your own best judgement and go with caution, everyone


Anonymous asked:
Since you don't answer otherkin asks here, do you know where I could possibly go for information/questions about it? I think I might be voidkin or plantkin but I am very much in need of resources/reliable answers

Sorry friend all the places I know to send you are personal blogs and I won’t hand those out here, this blog gets far too much traffic from reddit. 

Start with google


Anonymous asked:
for the anon with an abusive ex -- try changing your url? without leaving a redirect notice, or change urls, keep your old one, and leave the ask open for people who want the new one?
Anonymous asked:
hi, um, i'm nonbinary but i curently have my gender on my blog labeled as cis woman because... i had, a really abusive friend, and i know she stalks my blog (or gets her girlfriend to stalk it) and when i still talked to her she once was really awful when i told her i didn't feel 100% like a girl, because she was attracted to me and identified as a lesbian... so i'm just really scared about coming out, even on my blog. what should i do?

Do whatever you need to do to keep yourself safe. You don’t owe being out of the closet to anybody.


Anonymous asked:
does nick answer questions or just beck?

Nick answers questions when they have the time and inclination 


Anonymous asked:
Hi, so I was wondering how you came out to your family and friends as genderfluid queer because I identify myself with she/her/herself as well as lun/luns/lunself pronouns and was wondering how to tell other people that I don't always feel comfortable with their assumptions of my gender

Hey! I’m perfectly happy to tell this story, just be aware that my mother is abusive, my dad enabled it and they’re both really…controlling. So I don’t exactly have a good relationship with my parents to start with.

To come out to my parents, I moved thousands of miles away and then posted a status about being nonbinary to facebook

To come out to my friends, I gradually explained to people that this is who I am and got them to use my pronouns as a long, painful 6 month process by repeatedly insisting that they need to. I had a lot of arguments about the importance of my words, and trans issues in general. 


Anonymous asked:
hi, i'm writing a story in which one of the characters is non-binary (im writing in first person of the non-binary character) and i dont really know much about the gender. ive researched it, but i was wondering if you had any tips on how i should go about writing this character i.e. pronouns, people treating you differently, hate

Write a different book

I cannot possibly condense the entire experience of being nonbinary into 3 paragraphs or less and the fact that you’re asking me to means you haven’t done any research, you don’t know any nonbinary people, and you are completely unfit to write this character.



Last time I made a post like this, I got a few scattered messages of support, but it got overwhelmed by reblogs of doubt and hate.

My name is Dana, and I need your help.

I am a nonbinary (androgynous gender fluid), bisexual person. They/them pronouns please.

I have been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD, GAD, depression, PTSD, Bipolar II, IBS, and gastritis.

I currently live under the roof of my emotionally, verbally and in the past, physically abusive parents. My parents know the various things I’ve been clinically diagnosed with and they themselves are neurodivergent too, but they’re very ableist. I’ve been threatened with homelessness, I’m made to pay bills even though (seen above) I have less than $200 to my name.

Pictured above are my balances, my appointment card for my next appointment with my psychiatrist and therapist, and my credit card balance. I’ve been paying the minimum payment for months now, and the interest rates are adding up. That balance is for gas and medications.

I’ll find out this week if I managed to get a good job with a close friend. But the money in my accounts right now is all I have left. I’ve scoured every corner of the house, every purse and wallet, every hiding spot. This is all that’s left.

Every donation, every penny helps me enormously. You can find me on PayPal at Qtbugdrs.

If you can’t donate, please please signal boost. Thank you very much for reading.

Anonymous asked:

I don’t know how many times I have to say “I don’t do otherkin asks on this blog” but

Let me take this opportunity to remind you all

I don’t do otherkin asks on this blog

Especially not asks as clearly disrespectful in tone as this one


Anonymous asked:
I'm a cis straight white male. Do you automatically hate me?

No, but I do hate you for being the sort of ignorant asshole to ask me this question



tumblr user valuegirlhood harrasses underage trans girls, pass it the fuck along and destroy that piece of shit

hunterj-3 asked:
So it's a false assumption that there needs to be SOMETHING empirical in these words you keep throwing around, and I'm the one who needs to "learn better," whatever that's supposed to mean. Your idea that all you need to do to truly be something, specifically trans, is to identify as such is insulting to everybody who has struggled with a body or a mind mismatched with their sex. My question is where in the hell you get off pulling that shit and making me the bad guy for calling your ass out.

1) What the hell do you mean by empirical ? Stop throwing around science words without understanding science, please. Take a deep breath, take off your fedora, and go take a nap or something 

2) You clearly don’t understand sex or gender and if you’re interested in learning something (which I sincerely doubt but you never know) go look here [link] and here [link]

3) What part of “don’t contact me again” were you missing out on

4) I am going to laugh forever at you thinking that your ill-informed mess of a question was “calling me out”


hunterj-3 asked:
So then how do you differentiate being trans with just making shit up?

Your question is founded on a false assumption which is that there is an unacceptable version of transness, and that it is meaningful to draw the distinction between “really trans” and “just making shit up”.

We’re all really trans. Everyone who says they’re trans is trans. Everyone who says they aren’t cis is noncis. There’s no test to pass, there’s no ultimate criteria. All you have to do to be trans is identify that way.


P.S. Bite me

P.P.S. This is a gross question and I hope you learn better in the near future or, alternatively, never contact me again



desperately selling stuff I love

didn’t think it would happen, but things have gotten worse

after an appointment thing, I returned to my car and a tire was flattened

so a garage was called, and a guy came out to help- in the process of removing my tire, he snapped off two of the studs

then he left and didn’t take any responsibility for it ?? and I called my insurance place and got towed to a garage, where I paid $150 for a pair of new studs and a used tire

this is not okay and there is no way that I can afford to get my stuff from columbus (which will be tossed in a week or so?), unless I somehow make a substantial amount of money quickly (like $400??)

another issue is that I don’t have access to most of my possessions, and thus can’t get at any of my rad goodies to sell beyond what I have with me

so I guess I’m selling my Mother 3 Deluxe Box for $400 (with franklin badge, GB micro, and all the inserts, but no cartridge)

and I guess I’m again willing to sell my beloved Ibanez RG1xxv electric guitar with a hardshell case for $875 (the pink on here)

I don’t want to part with either, but I have no other options beyond begging strangers on the internet, which is a thing that I don’t want to make into a habit

please consider signal boosting

Please help Lilith out if you can

Anonymous asked:
Ok I wanna ask cause I legit don't know but how can you be trans (in the transitioning way not the nonbinary way) without having. dysphoria cause isn't that what causes the want to change?

Not necessarily. You can have any gender and want any sort of body. You don’t necessarily have to be uncomfortable with your body to want to change it.


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